Everything Wrong With The Mummy Reboot Trailer

By Kieran Webber

Hollywood has yet again decided that we the people need another reboot film, because writing and creating new stories takes too much time. At least that is how it feels. Behind the helm of this reboot is director/producer Alex Kurtzman and producer Chris Morgan, who have been instrumental in growing some of the most successful franchises of the past several years—with Kurtzman writing or producing entries in the Transformers, Star Trek and Mission: Impossible series, and Morgan being the narrative engineer of the Fast & Furious saga.

Before I get into this I want to make one thing clear, I am all for a reboot of The Mummy. In fact when I heard rumours of it I welcomed it. However, the first trailer for The Mummy has not filled me with joy or anticipation. It left me laughing holding my head in my hands thinking why oh why must we go down this road once again?

The trailer seemed to remove elements that made the original series great, and in its place is over the top effects, Tom Cruise and a semi-clad female villain. The original had a certain charm to them, similar to Indiana Jones. It was exciting, somewhat historical and at its heart about adventure.

Although the trailer as a whole was a huge disappointment for me there were key parts that really annoyed and agitated me. The aforementioned key parts being:

Military Involvement

Why is it that writers always try to add an American military twist to their tales, the opening scene on the trailer sees the US military loading a sarcophagus into a transport plane. It is such a boring narrative used in so many Hollywood blockbusters, America wants to use this historic artifact as a weapon, Mr Scientist says no bad idea and they go ahead any way then Mr Scientist says I told you that was silly. Within the first 25 seconds it is clear this is the narrative of the film.

Tom Cruise’s Scream 

I won’t even say anything here, watch the trailer and listen to that fucked up noise that splurges out of his weird little mouth.

Waking up in a morgue after a plane crash

So after a thousand birds fly into the plane forcing Tom and his mysterious female companion to roll around and bash off the interior, the plane comes to it’s demise crashing into the ground. I must admit this scene does look pretty amazing and is pretty nail biting but Tom wakes up in a morgue with not a scratch on his body with all his limbs intact! Are you fucking kidding me?

Rolling through the bus window 

Upon first seeing that I was gobsmacked I mean come the fuck on. A double decker bus is cascading towards you and somehow you jump into the broken window and roll across the top of the seats and out. No, boring over the top action scene to make up for the broken and empty storyline.

Basically, to sum up what I saw of this trailer was really disappointing. The original series was full of comedy, excitement and adventure and was taken with a pinch of salt. There was no political sway nor agenda but this film has boiled down to a narrative of good and evil. Naturally America is the good guys fighting against another new threat to this earth, leading the good fight with their moral compass and shiny poster boy Tom Cruise. What this film is going to lack in story they will make up for with impressive stunts and CGI, which for some may be fine but for someone who grew up watching Brendan Frasier fighting off scarabs and Imhotep I am left saddened.

With that said though I could be pleasantly surprised and really enjoy the film although I find that very hard to beleive at this point.

Watch the trailer and let us know what you think!


Kieran Webber

Journalism graduate based in Newquay, Cornwall. My project Clunk Magazine covers surf, Music, Art, skate and Lifestyle. In time we hope to integrate with as many artistic and creative people as possible making an online hub for creativeness, surfing and lifestyle, something I feel that accompanies the other.

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